


Baby Buffoonery

by 4ever_yours2



Category: Arrow - Fandom, DC Comics, The Flash
Genre: (The last tag is actually a tag?!?), Accidental Baby Acquisition, Fluff, M/M, baby shenanigans
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-01
Updated: 2019-03-01
Packaged: 2019-11-07 13:57:41
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,037
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17961884
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/4ever_yours2/pseuds/4ever_yours2
Summary: "Hey Oliver I found this baby on my last mission and Iris, Joe, Cecille and Jen is on some holiday. Cisco is in the Arctic and Caitlin said she's not looking after it, and I'm definitely not asking Ralph or Wells to help. So I was hoping you could help?"





	Baby Buffoonery

Barry skids to a stop in his full flash costume, the bad guy freezes in surprise before recovering and shooting at him. Barry covers quickly, and sees the guy ducking behind some cover too. Sensing his moment he speeds forward and grabs a hold of the guy's jacket "Put the gun down"  
The guy drops the gun in surprise as the cops round the corner. Barry looks over to them and says "He's all yours officers"  
They nod and cuff the guy, before dragging him away.  
He coms Caitlin "The guy's in custody"  
A crackle, "Good, come back when you are done"  
"Ok see you shortly" he turns the com off, and he's about to speed off, but a sound stops him. He looks around, but sees nothing. He shakes it off and prepares to go again. But that sound, a gurgle, is heard once more. Curiously Barry looks around, the gurgle turns into a cry. He immediate senses it comes from the corner opposite where the guy was taken. He steps closer and removes the debris. He gasps and falls back, the cleared debris reveals a baby, a crying baby. "Oh my god!" He inches closer, his hands tentatively reach towards the baby. The baby continues to cry until Barry picks him up and clutches him to his chest. They stare up at him with curious blue eyes.  
A crackle, "Flash you ok? It says you haven't move from your location in ten minutes"  
He turns his com on "Uh, yeah. Just found something and I got to show you"  
"Ok"  
He turns his com off, then he returns his attention to the baby "Well I can't speed with you so I guess we'll walk" then Barry remembers how far it is, it would take him an hour's walk from here to get to Star Labs. He looks back down at himself in his Flash outfit, then to the baby. He sighs in defeat "Ok maybe we can't walk....so it's the bus then" he walks out of the building and along side it until he reaches the main road. He scans up and down for a bus stop, he spots one on the corner to his left. The baby's blue eyes are looking around in wonder and curiosity. Barry reaches the bus stop and reads it's destinations.  
None reach near enough to Star Labs. He looks around once more and spots one down and across the road. He walks to the crossing and crosses the street once clear, then he heads down to the bus stop. He reads the destinations once more. Alas one reaches close enough to Star Labs, luckily enough it's the next bus. So he stands and waits five minutes for the bus to arrive.  
Once it does Barry carefully steps up, holding the baby safely to his chest, and thankfully the bus isn't full. But all the seats are taken, so he stands near the door in the middle of the bus and holds the bar. Murmurs erupt about the bus,  
"Is that The Flash?"  
"Hehe, when you got Flash at 7 but have to babysit at 6"  
"Is that his kid?"  
"Oh my god!"  
"The baby is so cute!!!"  
Then a young lady stands "Flash"  
He looks over at her, she gestures to her seat "please take it"  
He smiles "Thank you" and carefully sits down.

 

* * *

 

Barry walks into the cortex, the baby has fallen asleep "Caitlin" he calls out as he removes the mask. She walks out of the side room "Bar-what?!" She stops in surprise "Is that a baby?"  
"Shhh" he gently rocks the baby "I found them on the mission and I don't know what to do"  
"Barry I would love to help but I'm in the middle of something"  
He hears the computer behind her ping, she gives him a sheepish smile then returns to her work.  
Barry groans. He thinks of who could help, the Wests are all out of town, Cisco is in the Arctic, and frankly he's afraid of what Ralph and Sherloque would do. He carefully grabs his phone out of his pocket and checks his contact list. He scrolls until he hesitates on a name.  
Oliver Queen.  
Surely his boyfriend could help?  
He taps the call button and waits.  
One ring, two-it clicks to indicate that he has picked up.  
"Hey Barry"  
"Hey Ollie" he sounds chipper "so uh...."  
"What is it?"  
"I found this baby on my last mission and Iris, Joe, Cecille and Jen on some holiday. Cisco is in the Arctic and Caitln said she's not looking after it, and I'm definitely not asking Ralph or Wells to help. So I was hoping you could help?" Barry rushes through his speech  
Silence, more silence...then "Meet me at my house as soon as possible"  
"Ok, see you shortly"  
"Bye"  
The line goes dead.  
Barry looks down at the sleeping baby, then realizes that he's still in costume. He walks into the hall then down to the change rooms. He carefully places the baby securely onto the wooden bench then changes into civilian clothes. He then cautiously picks up the baby and walks out of the change room into the hall, then outside Star Labs and to the train station around the corner.  
The train arrives shortly after he gets to the station and he hops onto the first cart available and sits down in a vacant seat.  
About halfway through the journey the baby starts crying. Barry gently rocks him but when that doesn't work he stands and walks up and down the train with them. After ten minutes of nothing a women walks up to him "Having trouble?"  
He nods sheepishly "Yeah I don't know what's wrong"  
She smiles "New parent?"  
He gives a jerky nod, "When was the last time he ate?"  
Barry's eyes widen, for he did not know "Thisss morning"  
"Oh poor thing, he must be hungry. Do you have any bottles?"  
"We, ran out just before. I'm going back home to fetch more" he smiles, hoping it looks assuring.  
"How old is he?"  
Barry looks to the baby, quickly scanning, then to the lady "Six months"  
"Perfect! I've got a baby myself, she's almost seven months so I have some baby food suitable if you would like some?"  
Barry smiles gratefully and accepts. The lady leads them over to her seat "I'm Juliet by the way"  
"Barry" they stop just before the doors, her partner already there holding the baby. She says to him "Honey this is Barry, he's on his way home cause he forgot some bottles for his baby. Since he's six months I thought we could give a jar to them"  
He smiles "That's fine" he reaches into the pocket in front of him and retrieves one of the many jars, then hands it over to Barry with a smile "Can never be too prepared"  
"Thank you"  
Juliet hands him a small plastic spoon.  
He walks back down to his own seat, the baby seems to quiet down just a bit. Barry holds the baby in the crook of his left arm and puts the tray down on the seat to his right, putting the baby food on that. He opens it slowly then carefully feeds one spoonful to the baby. They accept it warily, then their mouth opens for another spoonful. Barry continues this until they push his hand away. Only a quarter of the food remains. He caps the jar once more. He turns to the baby again, but they've fallen asleep.

The baby continues to sleep when Barry walks off the train at Star City, and all the way to Oliver's apartment. He knocks on the door quietly. It only takes a few moments for Oliver to appear. "Hey Ollie" he steps inside  
"Hey Barry"  
Barry sits down on the couch, Oliver sits across from him and asks "What happened?"  
"I was on a mission and took down a guy. I was about to leave when I heard something. When I went to investigate I found this baby"  
"This baby? So you don't know the gender or name?"  
Barry averts his gaze "No"  
"Did you get any supplies at least?"  
"Supplies?"  
"Formula, diapers, food?"  
Barry shakes his head, no.  
"Alright then let's go and grab something" Oliver grabs his keys and leads Barry out of the apartment and to the garage via the elevator.  
At Oliver's sports car he turns to Barry "So I don't have a baby's seat so just put the seat belt around the both of you and hold him" Barry nods and holds the baby's head as he carefully lowers himself into the car. Oliver gets in quickly and buckles himself in, then helps Barry get the seatbelt over himself and the baby, firmly clicking the seatbelt into place. Then he turns the car on and eases out of the garage and onto the road, driving smoothly to the grocery store.

  
As they enter Oliver directs barry to get the diapers as he gets the formula and food. Barry wonders over to the baby section. He stops in front of the nappies and scans the many, many colourful boxes that seem to state the exact same thing. Then he looks at the baby, scanning himself for any clue as to what he should buy. But all the baby does it giggle at him, then Barry looks up at the colourful boxes, he still doesn't know what he's looking for.  
"Excuse me?"  
Barry turns his head, another guy stands next to him. The guy asks "Having trouble?"  
Barry nods, "Yeah I was told to get diapers but I don't know what I'm looking for"  
"How old?"  
"Six months"  
The guy reaches past him and grabs a green box "Then this would be the one you need, also this brand is the best one. To figure out which diapers you need it's based off how old they are, just look at this label" the other dude points to the found of the box, a white set of bold letters state '6months-1year' he hands it over to Barry. With a smile he says "Don't worry, I know that feeling. But trust me it gets easier"  
"Thank you"  
The guy nods and leaves. Moments later Oliver appears "Got everything?" Barry asks  
"Yup" Oliver takes the box out of his hands and leads them to the cashier. Oliver places formula, wipes, diapers, powder, food and bottles onto the belt. Barry looks over to him astounded. Oliver looks over at him and answers "Had to look after Thea when she was a baby"  
Barry smiles, envisioning a young Oliver taking care of a baby Thea.  
"Aw! New fathers?" The cashier asks with a warm smile  
Oliver looks to her, he smiles too "Yes, he's only a few months old"  
"Aw!" The cashier finishes scanning and bagging the items, Oliver pays, despite Barry saying he shouldn't, and they depart.

 

 

* * *

 

 

They arrive back at Oliver's house, Oliver puts all the grocery away besides the diaper, powder and wipes. "Barry time to change the diaper, bring him to the bench in the laundry room" Barry walks over to the laundry room with Oliver and Oliver shows him how to change a diaper.  
They also figure out the baby is a boy.  
The pair sit on the lounge, Oliver lounging with the baby on his chest, one of Oliver's hand support his back. Barry sits beside him, Oliver asks "So what should we name him? Even though we're only looking after him for a bit we can't keep calling him 'it' or 'the baby'"  
"Hmmm" Barry thinks, and thinks "What about....Noah?"  
Oliver ponders that, then "Sure" he gazes down to Noah. He's sleeping soundly.  
Barry watches from his position beside Oliver, fondness shining through his eyes at the adorable picture of Oliver cradling Noah with such tenderness.  
Softly, as to not awake Noah, Barry whispers "Tomorrow I'll search and set up a ping to see if anyone is missing their child. I'll also run a DNA test on him to see if there's any matches"  
With his free hand Oliver holds Barry's hand and squeezes gently "That sounds like a good idea"

**Author's Note:**

> Btw that experience with Barry and the Diapers is based off a legit experience of mine (I helped a dude pick out diapers and how to choose the correct one)


End file.
